How To Become A Living, Breathing Lie Detector
This post is part of an ongoing series on how to Raise Your Havingness Level. If you want to know what the Havingness Level is, how to find yours, or simply read the series from the beginning, go to Raise Your Havingness Level: Introduction.
In the previous weeks we talked about how dissatisfaction is good for you and what to do to use it like a superpower and start manifesting what you want. We also talked about how the instant gratification mentality is actually good for you.
Last week we talked about the inner critic, how to check if your limiting thoughts are yours or just stuff you picked up from other people, and how to easily get rid of the limiting thoughts that aren't yours.
So did you try doing last week's exercise for three days? How did it go? What did you discover about yourself and your limiting thoughts? (send me a message or comment below and let me know. I am really curious to hear what your experience with it was!)
If you did, you were probably surprised to discover that there is a TON of things that go through your mind daily that isn't yours at all!
So now that you have first-hand experience of how many of your limiting thoughts aren't yours, let's go a little bit deeper.
There is another very simple and quick tool you can use that can help you in many different ways and can also help you raise your havingness level.
How about a tool that you can use to tell if someone is lying?
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HOW TO TELL IF SOMEONE IS LYING
This tool (just like last week's tool as well as this one) is another tool from Access Consciousness.
The tool is very simple:
What's true will make you feel lighter and a lie will make you feel heavy.
Yep, that's it! Really simple, right?
Stay with me though; simple doesn't mean ineffective!
When you want to know if something is true, you simply watch if it's making you feel heavy or light. If you are not sure, try both statements in your mind and see which one feels lighter.
I know what you're thinking though right now: "Yeah sure, like that's going to be accurate! What feels lighter is probably going to be what I want to hear, and what feels heavier will be what I don't want to be true!"
That was exactly my reaction too when I first discovered this tool. In fact, it took me a long time to decide to even give it a try, exactly because I thought it was going to be a waste of time.
When I actually started using it though, I realized that -contrary to what I was expecting- there were cases where what I hoped wasn't true actually felt lighter. And later, I would get confirmation that my reading of the situation using the Light or Heavy Tool had been accurate.
Here's a video of Dr. Dain Heer explaining this tool:
Also, watch this:
A FEW WAYS YOU CAN USE THIS TOOL TO TOTALLY TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE:
The obvious one: when you want to tell if someone is lying to you or if they are telling the truth.
This was a big one for me, both for my job (I know in advance if someone is going to become a good customer, associate etc or if they are just lying to me and wasting both of our time) and in my personal life.
When trying to choose if you should purchase something or not.
When we are out to buy something, it's usually because we have specific needs.
What do you need from that specific product? Say it's a coffee machine. Do you want it to make decent coffee and last for years because you're tired of buying a new coffee machine every year? Do you want it to make amazing coffee? Do you want your wife to approve of the purchase?
Whatever it is you want, ask in your head if this specific coffee machine you're about to buy is going to do or provide you with (insert what you want). Does it feel light or heavy?
Considering how everybody is trying to sell us something these days, this tool can save you time and money by helping you figure out if you actually need something and if it's the right choice for you and your needs.
I recently wanted to learn how to do something tech-related and was trying to decide between an ebook and an online course. The course looked much better, but the ebook was much cheaper. I tried the light or heavy tool and the course felt lighter, but I didn't want to invest so much money in it so I decided to get the book instead. I ended up buying the course because whenever I tried to buy the ebook, the transaction wouldn't go through. Go figure! (I am really glad I bought the course by the way because I later found out that the book wasn't as focused on what I wanted to learn as I originally thought, so if I had bought it, I'd have ended up buying the course too after all. So the tool did work great for me, and I shouldn't have ignored my feeling of what's light to begin with).Investments, scratch tickets etc: I am really not good at anything that has to do with gambling, but if you gamble or if you want to make an investment, try asking the numbers/scratch ticket/investment in your head if it's going to make you money. Experiment with this and see how it works for you.
These are just a few examples. The possibilities are endless when it comes to what you can use this tool for!
But how can it help you raise your havingness level?
LIGHT OR HEAVY TOOL AND LIMITING THOUGHTS
EXERCISE NO. 1
For starters, a great way to use this tool to raise your havingness level is to start applying it to every statement or belief that crosses your mind, or that someone mentions, or that you read in a book or online, or that you hear on the radio or on TV.
Just because everybody believes something is true doesn't make it true.
It may not be true for you at all. It may actually be what's blocking you.
Take a piece of paper and write down everything you can think of that you believe is true for the area of your life where you're trying to raise your havingness level. Even the ones you're 100% certain are true. ESPECIALLY the ones you're 100% certain are true.
Use the light or heavy tool.
See what makes you feel lighter.
EXERCISE NO. 2
Here's the thing:
When someone says something and they believe it's true, it will read as true when using this tool (so there's a distinction between "is this person lying to me?" and "is what they are saying true?", which you should keep in mind and phrase your questions accordingly).
The thing is, the same applies to you and your limiting thoughts and beliefs.
This was in the first video, but just in case you missed it:
When someone says something that is actually true for you but you have bought the lie that it's not, it will feel heavy.
See, that's a havingness level issue. If you truly hate your body for example and don't believe you're beautiful, no matter how many people tell you that you are beautiful you aren't going to believe them, and what they say will read like a lie to you (now if you ask if they believe that you are beautiful, it will read as a truth, but the "is he/she right? Am I really beautiful?" will feel heavy, so not true).
Now considering that what we're trying to do here is raise the havingness level, all the things that keep it where it currently is will read as truths for you, because that's what you believe.
So here's an idea:
Why don't you start using this tool in any situation that someone says something that hits home when it comes to the area you're focusing on?
We all know the things that bother us and hurt us more, in terms of the limitations we believe we have. We all know the things we deep down desperately want to hear too. Whenever someone says that one thing you desperately WANT to hear but never actually believe is true when someone says that to you, use the heavy or light tool to determine:
If they truly believe that about you
If it's true for you
The thing could be "you are beautiful", or "you are an amazing public speaker", or "you are an amazing artist". You know what it is for you. That thing (or those things; it can be more than one) you secretly desire more than anything but believe you just aren't meant to be or have.
Start checking, to see if all the people who say that to you are actually lying or are being polite and kind (like you thought up until now) or if they actually believe it.
What if you discovered that each and every one of them truly believes that about you, and you're the only one who doesn't? Wouldn't that loosen the hold that limiting belief has on you?
What about the not-so-nice things people say to you? What if they don't believe them but they are saying them just to hurt you? Or because they feel threatened? Or because they are jealous of you?
How many things have you sabotaged in your life, because of your belief that something is that way and will never change when in reality this was only in your head?
Up until recently I was very bitter and hurt because I was certain that a person close to me truly doesn't care about me after all, doesn't appreciate me, doesn't value me and any kind words he says to me are a lie, just to get me off his back and stop me from complaining. I kept going over events and situations and conversations in my head, feeling horrible about myself, because in my mind, there was tons of proof that I was right. I had done everything to fix this but the situation stayed the same.
At some point, it occurred to me to use the light or heavy tool to check what is true here and what isn't. I didn't expect to get anything different than what I already believed.
Turns out, all of it was in my head.
ALL OF IT.
100%
I spent years suffering because of what I thought one person thought about me, and it was never true. It was all me. They didn't hate me. Looks like I was the one who hated me.
And the funniest part is that there were a number of issues with this person's behavior that in my mind were huge issues because they confirmed his bad opinion about me. When I realized it was all in my head, those issues weren't serious anymore. From the perspective of "he doesn't hate me," they didn't really mean anything. They could stay as they were, they weren't big issues anymore, more like minor annoyances.
But 2 days after I had the realization that it had all been in my head (aka this was a havingness level issue I was projecting on this person), I met the person and they behaved completely differently. It's like someone waved a magic wand and all the things I had tried desperately to change in my relationship with this person changed overnight.
Oftentimes, the mere realization that something we believed all our lives isn't actually true is enough for our havingness level to automatically go up.
And that changes our reality and what manifests in it.
What will manifest in your life if you start using the light or heavy tool?
This post is part of an ongoing series on how to Raise Your Havingness Level. If you want to know what the Havingness Level is, how to find yours, or simply read the series from the beginning, go to Raise Your Havingness Level: Introduction.
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